I know I write a lot of these... But I always go into too much detail when it comes to the open world content... So I lose the thread and get burned out when it comes to typing out every single detail that takes place in every mission. So for the sake of keeping myself invested and focused, let's just say the open world content would be an improved version of SR2, with maybe a few features from SRTT. But onto the story, which will not be typed in my usual format.
Keeping SRTT as cannon, we start off in a dream sequence where the Boss is re-enacting the events of "The Streets Of Stilwater" (Looking like the Default Playa from SR1), before the dream ends and we are met with the customization menu. After customizing your Boss, you learn that this game takes place after the events of STAG Film, where Pierce is now Mayor of Steelport, Shaundi is presumed dead. Angel's reputation in the wrestling community is restored, so he has returned to Murderbrawl. With the DeWynter Sisters dead, Zimos is now the main pimp in Steelport, keeping him busy, and Kinzie and Oleg have taken some time off to get to know each other better.
(Just gonna refer to the Boss as female for the remainder of this, my personal preference when playing)
So the Boss finds herself alone in a huge penthouse suite... Analysing her dream, she realises she's missing home, and decides to return to Stilwater. But as the plane is approaching Stilwater, the plane is hit. So the Boss must parachute out the back and land at the top of Mount Claflin, where she can see first hand that Stilwater is in disarray, and the big tell is that the Phillips Building is just completly gone. Needing to know what happened while the Saints were away, she tries contacting some old friends while making her way to the Saints Hideout. Tobias, Laura, Luz, and Troy are all unavailable.
As a last resort, the Boss calls Dex... Who actually responds. He tells her to meet him at the old Church... Hesitant, but needing answers, the Boss agrees. After arriving at the Old Mission House to find it burned to rubble, the Boss heads to the Red Light Loft, to find it's still standing. But upon entering, it's been looted and left in ruins. Getting desperate, the Boss goes to Friendly Fire, but after purchasing a weapon, she's forced to use all the ammo during a turf war between 3 gangs who look similar to the Syndicate Gangs... But heavily influenced by Stilwater's culture.
Having no ammo left, The Boss decides to meet with Dex anyway, but just bluff her way through any possible trap he might have set. The meeting is pretty uneventful, but very awkward. After agreeing to a temporary truce, the two cruise Stilwater and Dex fills the Boss in on what's been going on. After the Saints killed Loren, the Stilwater branch of the Syndicate fell apart without anyone to lead them. But not wanting to give up their power, they formed their own individual gangs and fought for control of the city. Dex doesn't know who's running the gangs, but he tells the Boss that he's had someone working undercover for him.
After the tour, and a brief intro to some "open world content", Dex asks the Boss to drop him off in Fox Drive. The Boss asks what he's doing out on a peninsular so far from the inner city, Dex points out that it's remote enough to stay away from the gang warfare. The Boss drops Dex off, but notices that Troy is there waiting for him. Upon seeing this, the Boss exclaims that "the city must really have gone to hell if you two are working together", before Troy tells the Boss to get settled in, then give them a call when she's ready to get to work. The Boss returns to the Red Light Loft, is introduced to the Crib Customization, flops on the bed, then exclaims that "it's good to be home".
Luz calls the Boss, telling her that Troy informed her that she's back in town, and asks for some help with her new business (Trafficking Activity), then tells the Boss to check in with all her old contacts as they'll have some work for her too. Wu - Escort, Tobias & Laura - Heli Assault, Jane - Mayhem, Helmers - Snatch, Wong - Assassinations, Donnie - Chop Shop, Legal Lee - Insurance Fraud, blah blah blah. As open world gameplay is not relevant to the story (other than City Takeover), it will not be forced to further the story (from this point). So the Boss meets up with Dex & Troy in the Fox Drive Warehouse to discuss moving forward with their plans to defeat the MourningStar, Hackers (Wordplay), and Brawlers.
It's at this point that a woman dressed like a member of the MourningStar enters the warehouse and the Boss instantly recognises her as Lin. Clearly shocked, Lin explains to the Boss that the body they found was one of the Rollerz who happened to wear the same outfit as Lin. She was rescued and survived after a long time in the hospital. The Boss feeling an energy she hadn't felt since her early days in the Saints, feels confident that with the old crew together, these gangs don't stand a chance. All they need, is some backup. So the Boss calls Pierce and tells him to send the Saints to Stilwater because... "It's our time now, let's get this shit started".
The Boss, Troy, and Dex set out to find a new and better Hideout. Feeling nostalgic, the Boss decides to take back the Church, making a statement that the true Saints are back for good. So they head to the Saints Row District, where a turf war between all 3 gangs is taking place. After clearing out Mission Beach, the Saints make a stand and fend off the Church from all 3 gangs. Just as they start to feel overwhelmed, who should show up but Pierce himself, with the Saints by his side. Any remaining enemies scatter back to their leaders, then the Saints get settled in. The Boss asks who's running Steelport, and Pierce says he left Kinzie and Oleg in charge. Once the crew is settled in, we get access to all 3 gang story arcs playable in any order (just like old times).
From this point on, Lin will be in charge of taking down the MourningStar, Troy will be in charge of taking down the Hackers, and Dex will be in charge of taking down the Brawlers... And Pierce will play a supporting role in all 3 arcs.
Noteworthy parts of Lin's Arc will be:
- Lin discovering who leads the MourningStar (Yung DeWynter - Viola & Kiki's stepsister)
- An awkward encounter where the Boss and Lin have to "fight" each other in order to not blow Lin's cover
- The Boss and Pierce having a singalong while blowing stuff up in a drive by
- Lin blowing her cover and almost getting herself and the Boss killed, but Pierce saves them both due to knowing about their history with getting caught
- A final confrontation with Yung, where the Boss gives her a choice, but Yung chooses to fight, not wanting to bring shame to herself or her gang
Noteworthy parts of Troy's Arc will be:
- Discovering Shaundi is still alive, hospitalised on heavy medication, only to be kidnapped by the Hackers and brought to Stilwater
- The Boss and Troy having a bonding experience while performing drive-bys
- The Boss and Pierce finding out that Shaundi is alive and kidnapped, then having to save her
- Shaundi embracing her Stilwater roots, and getting a new outfit taking inspiration from both her hippy and celebrity look
- A final confrontation with the Hackers Leader, who is an AI that the Hackers created to make the Saints think they even needed a leader, so after defeating the Hackers, the Boss just unplugs the computer during the AI's monologue about taking over the world
Noteworthy parts of Dex's Arc will be:
- Dex and Pierce arguing about strategy, while the Boss just ignores them both and decides to "wing it"
- Johnny Gat just returning out of nowhere and completely obliterating whatever operation the Boss, Dex, and Pierce were about to infiltrate
- Johnny Gat stealing Dex's thunder and getting back to business
- Johnny Gat getting mortally wounded by the Brawlers Leader, then getting sent to the hospital (Not sure who the Brawlers Leader will be at this moment in time)
- Dex and Pierce finally having some common ground in both disagreeing with Gat's strategy
- A final confrontation with the Brawlers Leader, where he overpowers Dex, Pierce, and the Boss... But lucky for them, Gat arrives to save the day (but still letting the Boss deal with the Leader) (Gat is also wearing an outfit that takes inspiration from both his classic and celebrity designs)
After all 3 gangs are dealt with, Stilwater seems to be getting back to normal... But when the Boss and Dex meet on the end of the Pier in Centennial Beach, Dex shows his true colours and informs the Boss that all the Saints are currently being kidnapped by the Masako to be killed, before stabbing the Boss and dropping her off the edge of the pier. This will be the only part of the game (or even entire series) to take place underwater, where the Boss manages to hold her breath as she makes her way across the sea floor back to shore. She calls Troy to come and pick her up (who is disgusted by Dex's betrayal), then they rescue the Saints before confronting Dex in the very warehouse where they reformed the Saints. This is where you get the choice to spare Dex and force him to work with the people he's tried to kill many times, or kill him and get some closure once and for all.
Homies by the end of the game will be:
Dex - after Prologue, but will be replaced by Zombie Dex if you kill him
Troy - after Prologue, with both Saints & Chief of Police options
Lin - after MourningStar Arc, with Saints, MourningStar, & Bloody Cannoness options
Shaundi - after Hackers Arc, with Classic, Hospital, Celebrity, Reborn, & Naked options
Gat - after Brawlers Arc, with Celebrity, Hospital, & Reborn options
Pierce - after all 3 Gang Arcs, with Mayor, Celebrity, & Reborn options
Luz - after all Trafficking Levels, with Los Carnales, Shoe Store, & Saints options
Wu - after all Escort Levels
Tobias & Laura - after all Heli Assault Levels
Jane - after all Mayhem Levels
Helmers - after all Snatch Levels
Wong - after all Assassinations
Donnie - after all Vehicle Thefts
Legal Lee - after all Insurance Fraud Levels
Kinzie - after Campaign
Zimos - after Campaign
Angel - after Campaign
Oleg - after Campaign
Josh - after Campaign, with Birk & Nyte Blayde options
Though not stated in the story, the Church will serve as the main HQ and not be customizable, but the old Phillips Building site will serve as a canvas for a fully customizable Crib with options everywhere from replicas of the Saints Towers from Steelport, to a rebuild of Purgatory but on the surface, or even just a simple trailer park... all with customizable interior options too. But this is not the only Crib in Stilwater, there's also the Red Light Loft, and several other purchasable Cribs scattered around the city, all with customizable interiors.
Gang Details:
MourningStar:
A very gothic version of the Morningstar. After the loss of Loren and DeWynter Sisters, they held a memorial funeral at Mourning Wood Cemetery... And soon after, the Cemetery became their new Hideout, and Mourning became their theme.
They control the most of the North Island, and Projects
Hackers:
In Stilwater, the Deckers felt kinda out of place, and like nobody took them seriously. But adding horror movie like theme to their neon wardrobe suddenly made them the most terrifying gang to cross paths with during the night. Their Hideout is in the Factories District
They're spread across the map in districts like the University, Museum, Boardwalk, Red Light, Truckyard, Factories, and Airport
Brawlers:
These guys are basically like the Brotherhood 2.0, former wrestlers, and bodybuilders who now assert their raw power to whoever steps in their way. Mostly controlling the south of South Island, as well as the Arena District, with the Arena being their Hideout.
And obviously all 3 gangs have done some recruiting of their own, so there some variety to them. All three gangs have male and female members, and a range of ethnicities.
Homie Conversations:
Dex & Troy:
Troy: Did I ever tell you about my trip to Santo Ileso?
Dex: Not that I remember.
Troy: The scenery is great... But just like Stilwater, it's plagued with gangs.
Dex: Typical.
Troy: I remember this one gang... What was their name again?
Dex: Troy...
Troy: The El something...?
Dex: Don't do this.
Troy: Oh, that's right. The Los Panteros.
Dex: I hate you.
Dex & Lin:
Dex: Nice job with the MourningStar.
Lin: Thanks.
Dex: What's up with you?
Lin: I still haven't forgiven you.
Dex: Oh, right.
Lin: Just because everybody thinks I'm dead, that doesn't give you the right to destroy my apartment.
Dex: To be fair, we destroyed the entire district, so...
Lin: You preserved the Church!
Dex: It's a Stilwater landmark.
Lin: You could have at least moved my stuff to storage first.
Dex: Well... That's not a bad point actually. My bad.
Dex & Shaundi:
Shaundi: Hey man, I just wanna thank you.
Dex: You do?
Shaundi: Yeah, if it weren't for you, the Carnales would still be in charge, and Loa Dust would have never came to Stilwater.
Dex: Ok, thanks... I guess?
Shaundi: You got any?
Dex: No.
Shaundi: Damn, what a waste of time.
Dex: Fuckin' stoners.
Dex & Gat:
Gat: So...
Dex: Just don't.
Gat: How's that job at Ultor working out for you?
Dex: Fuck off, Johnny.
Dex & Pierce:
Pierce: I feel your pain, man.
Dex: You know what it's like to betray your friends and try to have them killed?
Pierce: No! Shit man, I was referring to the Boss and Johnny shitting all over our plans.
Dex: Oh, right... Well, thanks.
Pierce: I don't feel comfortable talking to you anymore.
Dex & Luz:
Dex: It's been a while.
Luz: You mean since you threatened to kill me just for asking where my boyfriend was?
Dex: Jeez, tough room.
Dex & Wu:
Dex: So uh... How's business?
Wu: Great. I can't thank you enough.
Dex: Oh, glad to hear it.
Wu: All the traumatised people looking for some stress relief after you and your Masako terrorised the city, is making me rich.
Dex: Oh...
Dex & Tobias:
Tobias: It feels great to be back in the game.
Dex: Do I know you?
Tobias: Yeah, I ran Trafficking in Los Carnales territory back in the day.
Dex: Oh, right. I was wondering who was giving them some serious competition.
Tobias: Well, that's all thanks to the Boss. You Saints picked a real winner there. I don't think there's anyone stupid enough to try and kill them.
Dex: I should have seen that one coming.
Dex & Laura:
Laura: Can I interest you in some homemade brownies?
Dex: No thanks. I'm still recovering from Shaundi's cookies.
Laura: Oh, I've had those. They're good.
Dex: Not when you wake up behind a Freckle Bitch's with no pants.
Laura: You get used to it after the first ten times.
Dex: How many have you had?
Laura: I stopped counting after the first ten times.
Dex: Damn.
Dex & Jane:
Jane: I'm standing here, live with the former head of the Masako, now Saints Lieutenant, Dexter "Dex" Jackson. How do you respond to the claims that you and your Masako Team did more damage to the city than the Saints ever did.
Dex: That can't be true.
Jane: I have the numbers right here. $31,313,131.31.
Dex: See, there's no way we caused more damage than that.
Jane: That was your total.
Dex: Fuck.
Dex & Helmers:
Helmers: Hey, you're the asshole that short changed one of my girls.
Dex: Nope, that definitely wasn't me. I have no idea what you're talking about.
Helmers: I may be a stereotype, but I'm not racist. You're the guy.
Dex: Fine. How much do I owe you.
Helmers: You don't owe me anything. But Samantha is gonna be thrilled when I tell her I found you.
Dex: Why do bad things always happen to me?
Dex & Wong:
Dex: So, hypothetically... If I hired your services, would you send an assassin to kill the Boss?
Wong: The Boss is my assassin!
Dex: You only have one assassin?
Wong: One is all I need. The Boss is the only one I trust to get the job done.
Dex: Great talk. I gotta go.
Dex & Donnie:
Dex: Do we even have anything in common?
Donnie: We've both switched factions several times. So we're both not very loyal.
Dex: I think we're done here.
Donnie: Sorry.
Dex & Legal Lee:
Lee: You know, for the right price, I could sue the Boss for you?
Dex: I thought you worked for the Saints?
Lee: I work for the highest bidder... So what's your offer?
Dex: I'm broke.
Lee: Our business is concluded. See you in court.
Dex: Whatever... Wait, what?
Dex & Kinzie:
Kinzie: It's great to finally meet you.
Dex: That's not how everyone else feels.
Kinzie: I mean from an informational standpoint. I've got data on all the Saints, including Lin... But you're an enigma... It's like you just went off the grid after leaving the Saints.
Dex: Yeah well, after the Saints took ownership of Ultor, I had to disappear quick. But wherever I went, it always felt like I was being followed.
Kinzie: Cypher.
Dex: What?
Kinzie: The assassin the Saints sent after you. Her name is Cypher.
Dex: So it wasn't paranoia.
Kinzie: Let's continue this conversation back at my Inner Sanctum.
Dex: Uh... What?
Dex & Zimos:
Zimos: Ever been to Steelport before?
Dex: Well... It's kinda complicated.
Zimos: How is it complicated? You've either been there, or you have not.
Dex: Yes and no.
Zimos: That's not possible.
Dex: Trust me, it is...
Zimos: Well excuse me, if I don't believe you.
Dex: Ever heard of a "concept", or "rewrite"?
Dex & Angel:
Dex: So losing a mask is a big deal to you?
Angel: It's more than just "losing a mask". It's losing to the person you once trusted. The person you trained from the ground up, but the power went to their head. They wanted more, and they didn't care who they had to beat to get it... It's losing to the monster you created.
Dex: Yeah... I know the feeling.
Dex & Oleg:
Dex: So... Are you the Saints Bodyguard or something?
Oleg: I'm the strategist... Along with Pierce.
Dex: So I got replaced twice?
Oleg: Yes, it's no wonder you were made redundant.
Dex: I'm not redundant.
Oleg: Tell me, who does the Boss listen to more? You, or Pierce?
Dex: Fuck.
Oleg: That's what I thought.
Dex & Josh:
Dex: The Saints have actors now? What are you? Johnny Gat's stunt double?
Josh: No, I was supposed to play the role of a Saint in Gangstas In Space, but the movie was a botch job... And in the final cut I only got a few cameos before my character dies.
Dex: Yeah, I got a call for that. But with my past with the Saints, I declined.
Josh: It's a shame, the fans were really hoping to see you appear in the movie... But instead your name's just used in a throwaway gag.
Troy & Lin:
Lin: So, you still think I'm working for the MourningStar?
Troy: You're safe for now, but I've still got tabs on you.
Lin: You were in the Saints longer than me. You've seen my loyalty first hand.
Troy: Yeah, and you saw my "loyalty".
Lin: Tell me... Are you currently arresting the remaining gang in Stilwater... Or are you hanging out with their leader?
Troy: Uh...
Lin: Face it. Once a Saint, always a Saint.
Troy: What about Dex?
Lin: I'm not with the MourningStar!
Troy & Shaundi:
Shaundi: Be cool, he's on our side.
Troy: Who are you talking to?
Shaundi: Oh, heeey... Troy. How's it going?
Troy: Shaundi...
Shaundi: You still with the cops?
Troy: You know I'm the chief of police.
Shaundi: Right, right...
Troy: I can smell the Loa Dust.
Shaundi: It's not mine, I swear.
Troy: I know you're high, Shaundi. But I'm off duty when I'm with the Saints.
Shaundi: Phew... So... You want some?
Troy: Fuck it, why not.
Troy & Gat:
Gat: Hey, so about that sentence?
Troy: You were going to be sentenced to death... But since you were presumed to be dead, the charges were dropped.
Gat: So... I'm good?
Troy: No judge in the world would agree to take your case after you and the Boss took out the entire courthouse.
Gat: Nice.
Troy & Pierce:
Pierce: Hey man, I'm trying to get my music carrier off the ground. You wanna buy my demo tape?
Troy: That depends, do you want to serve your jailtime for robbing Poseidon's Palace?
Pierce: You could have just said "no".
Troy: That's what I thought.
Troy & Luz:
Troy: Hey, I'm sorry about... Well, you know.
Luz: Confiscating my shoes as evidence!
Troy: I was just doing my job.
Luz: Oh, and we're you also "just doing your job" when I saw you wearing them, when I went to your office?
Troy: What!? Don't be ridiculous.
Luz: I could see under your desk, Troy.
Troy: You tell anyone about this, and you'll end up behind bars for the whole summer.
Luz: Not beach season... Oh, my bad. You are not the cop I'm looking for.
Troy: That's right.
Troy & Wu:
Troy: Is my 3 o'clock booked?
Wu: Yes Troy. I'm sure Loretta is looking forward to seeing you again.
Troy: Can I book a 5 o'clock too?
Wu: You know, you could just hire her to work at your office?
Troy: Nah, it's too public. I need to keep this on the downlow until we make it official.
Wu: You're going to propose?
Troy: You're surprised?
Wu: I was just being nice. I had to buy noise cancelling headphones for your visits.
Troy: Yeah, sorry about that.
Wu: Good luck though.
Troy: Thanks Wu... Wait, I though the rooms were sound proof?
Wu: And now you know how loud you are.
Troy & Tobias:
Tobias: I ain't working with no cops man.
Troy: I'm not just a cop. I'm the chief of police.
Tobias: Damn, and I thought the last guy was corrupt.
Troy: I'm not corrupt, I'm just helping out an old friend... Who happens to be the leader of a criminal empire... Holy shit I'm corrupt.
Troy & Laura:
Troy: You gotta get better at your job. Do you know how many times I've arrested you?
Laura: You've gotta hire better security at the prison. Do you know how many times I've escaped?
Troy: I walked right into that one.
Troy & Jane:
Jane: Standing next to me, is cheif of police, Troy Bradshaw. Tell me, Troy, are you aware that the city sees your police force as nothing more than a joke?
Troy: Who else is gonna keep the peace in this city?
Jane: Well... Since the Saints returned, gang violence has decreased dramatically.
Troy: Oh yeah, well who do you think cleans up after the Saints?
Jane: So your police force is more of a clean up crew?
Troy: This interview is over.
Troy & Helmers:
Helmers: Why did you Impound my trailer?
Troy: I told you multiple times to move it for Ultor's retail park.
Helmers: And I told you that I never approved the building permit.
Troy: You were out voted. Was the monetary compensation not enough?
Helmers: You mean a discount coupon for a twelve pack of Ultor brand beer? Of course it was enough... But you could have just moved my trailer instead of impounding it.
Troy & Wong:
Troy: You know, if someone is causing you problems, you could just report them to the police?
Wong: And what if the police are causing me problems? Who do I report them to?
Troy: Or you could just do what you do best, I'll keep my judgements to myself.
Wong: You learn very quick.
Troy & Donnie:
Troy: Is my car repaired yet?
Donnie: You do know how a car works, don't you?
Troy: No, I just want it fixed.
Donnie: Oh, well... I came across a problem with the... Flux capacitor, so I'll need to order a new one.
Troy: Damn, is that expensive?
Donnie: Well, normally it's around $10,000. But for you, I'll give you 30% off.
Troy: You know, maybe Doc Brown can give me a better quote?
Donnie: On second thought, your car will be ready by Friday, and this one's on the house.
Troy: Pleasure doing business with you.
Troy & Legal Lee:
Troy: Fuckin' lawyers.
Lee: Fuckin' cops.
Troy & Kinzie:
Troy: We could really use your skills at the Stilwater PD.
Kinzie: Your "gaming room" doesn't even have a PC.
Troy: How do you know that? You've never even been to this city before.
Kinzie: I've seen every dark corner of this city all from the comfort of my Inner Sanctum. No secret is safe from me.
Troy: Uh... But all secrets are safe With you... Right?
Kinzie: Until I need them for blackmail, sure.
Troy: Well, I'll just be sure to stay on your good side then.
Kinzie: I can recommend a really good designer shoe store not far from your station. They even have your size.
Troy: Alright, but not here. We'll meet somewhere less exposed.
Troy & Zimos:
Zimos: You on duty right now?
Troy: Not when I'm with the Boss.
Zimos: Good... So how's business?
Troy: We just arrested 4 pimps today. What did you say your job was again?
Zimos: Uh... I'm a romance manager.
Troy: Sounds very professional. (talks into radio) Keep an eye on this guy.
Zimos: Who are you talking to?
Troy: Don't worry about it.
Troy & Angel:
Troy: I'd try to make small talk with you, but I don't think we have much in common... Plus I don't care for a sport that's fixed.
Angel: Murderbrawl is not like traditional wrestling. Matches can turn into literal bloodbaths, contenders have died... There's no predecided winner, you win by not giving up. It's a sacred sport that...
Troy: Are you always on?
Angel: I don't like you.
Troy & Oleg:
Oleg: How did you become the chief of police?
Troy: I earned the spot.
Oleg: But did you really?
Troy: I defeated the Saints, the most prominent gang in Stilwater.
Oleg: You did not defeat them, they defeated themselves... You just happened to be in the right place at the right time.
Troy: Ok, but...
Oleg: And I should point out that you resurrected the Saints.
Troy: What!?
Oleg: By keeping the Boss alive on life support, you kept the spirit of the Saints alive too. And once they awoken, it was only a matter of time before the Saints would rise again.
Troy: Wait... No...
Oleg: You're not the chief of police, you're a Saint... Accept it.
Troy: Well, someone still has to run the police department. And I'm the only one qualified, so...
Oleg: I guess you can have your cake and eat it.
Troy & Josh:
Josh: Did you get the part?
Troy: Nah, they said I was too short.
Josh: Did you try that trick I showed you?
Troy: Yeah, but the only heels I could get my hands on were Luz's stilettos. And I can't practice walking in them in front of the other cops.
Josh: Then come over to my place, I'll teach you.
Troy: You sure your place isn't bugged?
Josh: I'll have to check with Kinzie.
Lin & Shaundi:
Shaundi: So, did I replace you?
Lin: That depends, did you infiltrate an enemy gang to gather information on them and bring them down from the inside?
Shaundi: Um... I mean, I slept with people in the enemy gangs, and happened to get information just by being in the right place at the right time... Does that count?
Lin: I would not sink to that level.
Shaundi: "Sink"? I had sex for fun. Getting the dirt on our enemies was just a bonus. Plus that's not what Donnie told me.
Lin: Hey, hands off, he's mine.
Lin & Gat:
Gat: Why didn't you call?
Lin: I was in hiding. Plus I figured the loss would motivate you to wipe out the Rollerz faster.
Gat: You could have let me know, I would've kept your secret.
Lin: You were that distraught over losing me?
Gat: Yeah, so much that I lost focus and got kidnapped by Big Tony.
Lin: (bursts out laughing) You fuckin' liar! The Boss told me all about how you got too cocky and almost lost your leg.
Gat: Oh yeah, well the Boss told me that you were enjoying being tied up by Sharp.
Lin: Fuck you, asshole.
Gat: I missed this.
Lin: Me too.
Lin & Pierce:
Lin: So you replaced Dex?
Pierce: Why is that so surprising?
Lin: Dex was always so serious, and commanding... You're the complete opposite.
Pierce: Hey, I can be serious and commanding.
Lin: No you can't.
Pierce: Yes I can!
Lin: Can not.
Pierce: Can too!
Lin: I don't think so.
Pierce: Man, I hate you right now.
Lin: I think I've made my point.
Lin & Luz:
Lin: I gotta know, why Angelo?
Luz: Mostly for the money.
Lin: That's it?
Luz: Well... He was also "well endowed".
Lin: I think we're done here.
Lin & Wu:
Wu: What are you doing here?
Lin: What?
Wu: You've got a client in 5 minutes.
Lin: Wait, I'm not...
Wu: Don't make me give you a another pay cut.
Lin: Wu, it's me... Lin?
Wu: Oh, I'm sorry. You look just like one of my employees... And the local laundromat owner... And a member of the Rollerz... Have you considered a carrier as an undercover spy?
Lin: No, I've never thought about it.
Wu: Well, you should, you'd blend in really well.
Lin: No shit.
Lin & Tobias:
Tobias: Hey, weren't you a zombie at some point?
Lin: No, you must have been hallucinating.
Tobias: But Laura told me she'd sometimes be hanging out with the Boss and zombie you.
Lin: Well then she must have been hallucinating.
Tobias: Then what about Chicken Ned? He saw you too.
Lin: Fine, you caught me. I'm a zombie.
Tobias: I fuckin' knew it!
Lin & Laura:
Laura: You look different. Less blue than what I remember.
Lin: Um... I was wearing a Halloween costume last time.
Laura: Oh, well it was very convincing. You looked a lot like a real zombie.
Lin: That's the power of makeup.
Laura: And the way you detached your arm to use as a weapon...
Lin: Hey, look over there... Is that a bird?
Laura: No, it looks more like a plane.
Lin & Jane:
Jane: I'm standing here with former zombie...
Lin: I'm not nor have I ever been a "zombie".
Jane: That's not what this exclusive footage shows.
Lin: It's fake... It's edited... It's from a movie... This interview is over.
Lin & Helmers:
Helmers: You one of my girls?
Lin: No.
Helmers: Are you sure?
Lin: (Sigh) Not this again. I get it, I have a very generic face... It's why I'm so good at being undercover. Now can we just drop this.
Helmers: So you didn't work for me to pay for Stilwater U?
Lin: Wait, Helmers? What the fuck happened to you?
Helmers: Ultor expanded into the alcohol industry.
Lin & Wong:
Wong: You still owe me for that tea.
Lin: No, the Boss picked up my tab, remember.
Wong: No they did not, and they promised they'd bring you to me. So where's my money?
Lin: Well played, Boss.
Lin & Donnie:
Donnie: Lin, I uh... I missed you. And I know you were only getting close to me to get information for the Saints, but I feel like we really bonded... And I know you're probably not interested, but... I uh... I know this really good sushi restaurant on the boardwalk... And I was hoping... Uh...
Lin: Get to the point before I knock you out.
Donnie: Do you wanna go on a date with me?
Lin: It's about fuckin' time. Yes.
Donnie: Oh man, I didn't expect you to say yes. Now I'm nervous.
Lin: Don't worry, Donnie. I'll show you a good time.
Lin & Legal Lee:
Lin: So do I have a case?
Lee: I'm afraid not.
Lin: Why not?
Lee: Well, there's too much evidence against you.
Lin: So... I'm stuck with it then?
Lee: Well, unless you can disprove that you were a zombie, then I'm afraid you'll just have to deal with people calling you one.
Lin: (Thinks)... Can we spin it as "discrimination"?
Lee: Now you're talking.
Lin & Kinzie:
Kinzie: You know what I'm going to say.
Lin: And you know I don't want to talk about it.
Kinzie: You did die, no matter what you told everyone else.
Lin: So?
Kinzie: So, how did you come back to life?
Lin: That's classified.
Kinize: Not for long.
Lin & Zimos:
Zimos: Could you help an old man out?
Lin: What do you need?
Zimos: One last night of fun, while I'm still able to walk.
Lin: You know the Boss warned me about you.
Zimos: Well it was worth a shot... I'll just head back to my carwash, where my girls know what I like.
Lin: Wait? You own a carwash?
Zimos: Sure do, best carwash in Steelport.
Lin: Do you do repairs too?
Zimos: Sure, whatever you need.
Lin: How much will it cost?
Zimos: One night, that you will never forget.
Lin: Fuck it, you got a deal.
Lin & Angel:
Lin: Living in hiding sucks, huh?
Angel: You know it. My gym was in such a state, that the Saints hired exterminators because they thought they'd find rats.
Lin: Hey, at least you had your own place. I was living in a storage locker. I had to sign up for fight club just to have access to a shower.
Angel: Oh, so you've been in the arena too?
Lin: Yeah, and let me tell ya, if Sharp had tried to kidnap me now, it would have ended a lot differently.
Angel: Yet somehow Yung was able to kidnap you?
Lin: She drugged me, that's cheating.
Lin & Oleg:
Oleg: Working undercover is no easy job.
Lin: You said it, big guy.
Oleg: Did you ever wonder if you were on the right side?
Lin: When Julius was in charge, there was no question. His only goal was to clear the Row of gang violence... But he knew it wouldn't stop unless we wiped out the gangs altogether... And with that came more income, more power... And more corruption... I wish I could have stopped it, but it was too late... We were all in too deep.
Oleg: I understand.
Lin & Josh:
Josh: Hey, how'd you like to play the Bloody Cannoness?
Lin: What?
Josh: She's a character in my tv show "Nyteblayde".
Lin: Sorry, I'm not an actor.
Josh: Oh please, the Bloody Cannoness is just in the series to keep all eyes on the screen... And to sell merch.
Lin: Yeah, I'd rather keep my dignity.
Josh: Is your dignity in the exposed underwear of that MourningStar outfit? Or somewhere in that extra tight corset that displays most of your chest?
Lin: Hey, that's empowering... Your show is just demeaning.
Josh: There's a scene where the Bloody Cannoness gets to beat the shit out of Nyte Blayde?
Lin: I'll take the job.
Shaundi & Gat:
Shaundi: Hey, Johnny?
Gat: Yeah, Shaundi?
Shaundi: I survived an explosion.
Gat: That's pretty impressive.
Shaundi: And survived being crushed by debris from the statue.
Gat: Where are you going with this, Shaundi?
Shaundi: I think I'm ready.
Gat: You're not ready.
Shaundi: I totally am.
Gat: Trust me, you're not.
Shaundi: You're just afraid that I'll beat you.
Gat: Oh, ok. You can fight me, but don't say I didn't warn you.
Shaundi: Yes! I am so gonna win.
Gat: (Chuckles at her naivety)
Shaundi & Pierce:
Pierce: So, are you angry Shaundi, or chill Shaundi?
Shaundi: What's that supposed to mean?
Pierce: Angry it is, got it.
Shaundi: Hey, be cool. I'm chill... You wanna smoke a bowl?
Pierce: Ok, I guess you're chill then.
Shaundi: You "guess"? Don't I seem chill to you?
Pierce: And now you're angry again... What the hell!?
Shaundi: (Laughs) Oh, this is gonna be so much fun.
Pierce: Fuck it, you're not angry or chill, you're just crazy.
Shaundi & Luz:
Luz: Those are nice boots.
Shaundi: Thanks, they're from the new season's collection.
Luz: Really? I don't have them in my store.
Shaundi: Luz, you gotta stop falling behind.
Shaundi & Wu:
Shaundi: Wu, you got a slot available?
Wu: You know I only have female employees right?
Shaundi: Yeah, but you're a massage parlour, right?
Wu: We used to be. But now we're more of a... "what happens in the parlour, stays in the parlour" type of establishment...
Shaundi: So, you're a brothel?
Wu: I guess you could call it that.
Shaundi: So... Is there a slot available or not?
Wu: Uh... How's 4:30?
Shaundi: Perfect.
Wu: I didn't realise you were...
Shaundi: It's just a "massage", remember?
Wu: Right, of course.
Shaundi & Tobias:
Tobias: I'm surprised you're back on the Loa, Shaundi.
Shaundi: Yeah well, being in charge of Ultor really changed me... But now that I'm back in Stilwater and free from corporate meetings, I can get back to doing what I love.
Tobias: Playing hacky-sack and getting high?
Shaundi: Good times.
Tobias: Good times.
Shaundi & Laura:
Laura: I gotta say, taking the Loa Dust market has really made my business skyrocket.
Shaundi: Yeah, I noticed you and Tobias moved into Price's Mansion.
Laura: Yeah, we didn't need the extra space, but we have so much money, we decided to spoil ourselves.
Shaundi: Good for you. I still need to check out my house... It's been a while since I was there.
Laura: Oh... You may not like what you find.
Shaundi: What do you mean?
Laura: I think the MourningStar raided it... Then turned it into gambling den.
Shaundi: Actually, it always looked like that.
Laura: Oh... You have a unique way of living.
Shaundi & Jane:
Jane: I'm standing here with the cover girl for the Boy Toy magazine, Shaundi.
Shaundi: Is that really what I'm most known for?
Jane: Well, there's your gameshow, where the winner gets to sleep with you. Your online website, where people pay to see you naked. Your record for most ex boyfriends, girlfriends, or just partners in general, in one city.
Shaundi: Wow, this should really be a wake up call...
Jane: But it's not, is it?
Shaundi: Not really.
Shaundi & Helmers:
Shaundi: You still looking for workers?
Helmers: I thought you were set with the Saints?
Shaundi: I don't do it for the money.
Helmers: So... I get to keep the money?
Shaundi: Same deal as before.
Shaundi & Wong:
Shaundi: I am really sorry about last time.
Wong: Apologise all you want, but you're still banned from my restaurant.
Shaundi: So I had a little too much beer and crashed my car through your front window.
Wong: Damages like that happen all the time in Stilwater, but you got out of the car completely naked, then vomited all over table 5.
Shaundi: That part I don't remember.
Wong: They hadn't even finished eating.
Shaundi & Donnie:
Shaundi: Really sorry about your garage.
Donnie: What incident are you referring to?
Shaundi: There's more than one?
Donnie: Well, there's the time you sent the Boss to my garage to find out what happened to Carlos. There's the time you drove a car bomb into my garage, after which I had to rebuild the entire building. And there's the time you crashed your car through the shutter door, got out your car drunk and completely naked, then vomited all over workbench.
Shaundi: I have got to stop drinking in the hot tub.
Shaundi & Legal Lee:
Shaundi: You can't be serious?
Lee: Unless you can prove that it won't happen again, I am.
Shaundi: I'll just leave my keys with someone else before I start drinking in the hot tub.
Lee: It's not just the hot tub, you can't drink at all.
Shaundi: How about this... I give my keys to the Boss before I start drinking, then I can get behind the wheel.
Lee: But you could still find your way to Freckle Bitch's and end up vomiting in the fryers again.
Shaundi: Ugh... Fine, no more alcohol.
Lee: Or drugs.
Shaundi: That's it, Boss we're heading to the courthouse.
Shaundi & Kinzie:
Kinzie: So, you're worried about me bugging your bedroom?
Shaundi: Yeah, that's an invasion of privacy.
Kinzie: You've been drunk and naked out in public in both Stilwater and Steelport... And you're the cover girl for Toy Boy... What privacy would I be invading!?
Shaundi: Oh I think you already know.
Kinzie: My set up's better.
Shaundi: That's a matter of opinion... And personal taste.
Shaundi & Zimos:
Zimos: Hey girl, you look like you like to have fun.
Shaundi: Zimos, it's me. Shaundi.
Zimos: Oh shit. Would you stop changing your appearance so much.
Shaundi & Angel:
Angel: You're the most resilient person I know.
Shaundi: How so?
Angel: You survived an explosion, and being crushed by a giant statue... All the training in the world couldn't prepare me for something like that.
Shaundi: So do you think I could take Gat?
Angel: No.
Shaundi: But you just...
Angel: Everyone has their limits, even you.
Shaundi & Oleg:
Shaundi: Everyone thinks I can't fight Gat, but I know I can.
Oleg: Of course you could fight him.
Shaundi: Thank you.
Oleg: But Gat would win.
Shaundi: You too? Why can't I beat Gat?
Oleg: You just can't.
Shaundi: But I suppose you can, right?
Oleg: In chess, easily... In a fight... No.
Shaundi: Why is everyone kissing Johnny's ass?
Oleg: This is not about ass kissing, it's about determination. Even in defeat, he still manages to give one last "fuck you" before falling to the enemy.
Shaundi: And you don't think I can do that?
Oleg: Tell me, when you were tied up on that statue, did you even attempt to fight Kia?
Shaundi: How could I? I was tied up.
Oleg: And yet so was Gat aboard that plane. But that didn't stop him.
Shaundi: Fuck.
Shaundi & Josh:
Josh: Hey, I'm loving the new look.
Shaundi: And now I want to burn my clothes.
Josh: I thought you were getting back to your roots? Showing the more fun loving, care free side of yourself? I'm sure that side of you would give me a chance?
Shaundi: You know what, you're absolutely right.
Josh: I... I am?
Shaundi: Yeah, so why don't we head back to my place? We'll drink some beer, smoke some Loa Dust, tattoo each other, then I'll take you to my bedroom and strap you to my bed. I hope you're limber, because it's going to be a very rough night.
Josh: Oh second thought, I think I'll ask Lin...
Shaundi: She's taken.
Josh: Then maybe Luz?
Shaundi: I doubt you're her type.
Josh: Kinzie?
Shaundi: Oh yeah, I'm sure she'll have fun with you.
Josh: What?
Shaundi: I said "I'm sure you two will have fun".
Gat & Pierce:
Pierce: Just admit it, my plan would have worked.
Gat: Man whatever, me and the Boss had things covered.
Pierce: Oh yeah, you had things totally covered when the cops followed you back to Aisha's house, so the Ronin knew where the money was, and then they showed up and... and...
Gat: And what Pierce?
Pierce: You know what man, it doesn't matter. It's all in the past now.
Gat: Yeah, all of it's in the past... Including her.
Pierce: Yeah, I'm sorry man... My plan was probably way too complicated to work anyway... With the doll house, and chess pieces... That shit's for movies.
Gat: Yeah, movies...
Pierce: Hey man, why don't we head on over to Tee 'N' Ay? My treat?
Gat: Good call.
Gat & Luz:
Luz: You're a total badass.
Gat: Uh... Thanks?
Luz: You know, I heard a rumour about you... An "8 inch" rumour, if you know what I mean?
Gat: Sorry, not interested.
Luz: Fine, but you're missing out.
Gat: I'll take your word for it.
Gat & Wu:
Wu: Hey, do you happen to know when the next Aisha album is coming out?
Gat: Don't hold your breath.
Gat & Tobias:
Tobias: It's good to have you back man.
Gat: It's good to see you too.
Tobias: Remember that time you ripped a payphone out the ground to fight off those Samedi assholes.
Gat: Or how about the time you unearthed that stop sign and skewered that guy from the Brotherhood?
Tobias: Good times man.
Gat: Good times.
Gat & Laura:
Laura: Are you coming to Toby's birthday party?
Gat: Birthday party? For Tobias? I didn't think he was into that sort of thing.
Laura: It's at Technically Legal during the Policeman's Ball.
Gat: I wouldn't miss it for the world.
Gat & Jane:
Gat: So... Are you going to interview me?
Jane: Why?
Gat: You do know who I am, right?
Jane: Yes, you're the infamous Johnny Gat.
Gat: And you're telling me that's not news worthy?
Jane: It would be, but you've given me so many stories to cover, that the station is getting bored with you.
Gat: Wait, seriously? People are bored with the one and only Johnny Gat?
Jane: Well, you're too predictable... If you were to say, go into a laundromat and do some laundry, that would take people by surprise. But as it is, people know what to expect from you.
Gat: Huh... Well I'll be damned.
Gat & Helmers:
Keeping SRTT as cannon, we start off in a dream sequence where the Boss is re-enacting the events of "The Streets Of Stilwater" (Looking like the Default Playa from SR1), before the dream ends and we are met with the customization menu. After customizing your Boss, you learn that this game takes place after the events of STAG Film, where Pierce is now Mayor of Steelport, Shaundi is presumed dead. Angel's reputation in the wrestling community is restored, so he has returned to Murderbrawl. With the DeWynter Sisters dead, Zimos is now the main pimp in Steelport, keeping him busy, and Kinzie and Oleg have taken some time off to get to know each other better.
(Just gonna refer to the Boss as female for the remainder of this, my personal preference when playing)
So the Boss finds herself alone in a huge penthouse suite... Analysing her dream, she realises she's missing home, and decides to return to Stilwater. But as the plane is approaching Stilwater, the plane is hit. So the Boss must parachute out the back and land at the top of Mount Claflin, where she can see first hand that Stilwater is in disarray, and the big tell is that the Phillips Building is just completly gone. Needing to know what happened while the Saints were away, she tries contacting some old friends while making her way to the Saints Hideout. Tobias, Laura, Luz, and Troy are all unavailable.
As a last resort, the Boss calls Dex... Who actually responds. He tells her to meet him at the old Church... Hesitant, but needing answers, the Boss agrees. After arriving at the Old Mission House to find it burned to rubble, the Boss heads to the Red Light Loft, to find it's still standing. But upon entering, it's been looted and left in ruins. Getting desperate, the Boss goes to Friendly Fire, but after purchasing a weapon, she's forced to use all the ammo during a turf war between 3 gangs who look similar to the Syndicate Gangs... But heavily influenced by Stilwater's culture.
Having no ammo left, The Boss decides to meet with Dex anyway, but just bluff her way through any possible trap he might have set. The meeting is pretty uneventful, but very awkward. After agreeing to a temporary truce, the two cruise Stilwater and Dex fills the Boss in on what's been going on. After the Saints killed Loren, the Stilwater branch of the Syndicate fell apart without anyone to lead them. But not wanting to give up their power, they formed their own individual gangs and fought for control of the city. Dex doesn't know who's running the gangs, but he tells the Boss that he's had someone working undercover for him.
After the tour, and a brief intro to some "open world content", Dex asks the Boss to drop him off in Fox Drive. The Boss asks what he's doing out on a peninsular so far from the inner city, Dex points out that it's remote enough to stay away from the gang warfare. The Boss drops Dex off, but notices that Troy is there waiting for him. Upon seeing this, the Boss exclaims that "the city must really have gone to hell if you two are working together", before Troy tells the Boss to get settled in, then give them a call when she's ready to get to work. The Boss returns to the Red Light Loft, is introduced to the Crib Customization, flops on the bed, then exclaims that "it's good to be home".
Luz calls the Boss, telling her that Troy informed her that she's back in town, and asks for some help with her new business (Trafficking Activity), then tells the Boss to check in with all her old contacts as they'll have some work for her too. Wu - Escort, Tobias & Laura - Heli Assault, Jane - Mayhem, Helmers - Snatch, Wong - Assassinations, Donnie - Chop Shop, Legal Lee - Insurance Fraud, blah blah blah. As open world gameplay is not relevant to the story (other than City Takeover), it will not be forced to further the story (from this point). So the Boss meets up with Dex & Troy in the Fox Drive Warehouse to discuss moving forward with their plans to defeat the MourningStar, Hackers (Wordplay), and Brawlers.
It's at this point that a woman dressed like a member of the MourningStar enters the warehouse and the Boss instantly recognises her as Lin. Clearly shocked, Lin explains to the Boss that the body they found was one of the Rollerz who happened to wear the same outfit as Lin. She was rescued and survived after a long time in the hospital. The Boss feeling an energy she hadn't felt since her early days in the Saints, feels confident that with the old crew together, these gangs don't stand a chance. All they need, is some backup. So the Boss calls Pierce and tells him to send the Saints to Stilwater because... "It's our time now, let's get this shit started".
The Boss, Troy, and Dex set out to find a new and better Hideout. Feeling nostalgic, the Boss decides to take back the Church, making a statement that the true Saints are back for good. So they head to the Saints Row District, where a turf war between all 3 gangs is taking place. After clearing out Mission Beach, the Saints make a stand and fend off the Church from all 3 gangs. Just as they start to feel overwhelmed, who should show up but Pierce himself, with the Saints by his side. Any remaining enemies scatter back to their leaders, then the Saints get settled in. The Boss asks who's running Steelport, and Pierce says he left Kinzie and Oleg in charge. Once the crew is settled in, we get access to all 3 gang story arcs playable in any order (just like old times).
From this point on, Lin will be in charge of taking down the MourningStar, Troy will be in charge of taking down the Hackers, and Dex will be in charge of taking down the Brawlers... And Pierce will play a supporting role in all 3 arcs.
Noteworthy parts of Lin's Arc will be:
- Lin discovering who leads the MourningStar (Yung DeWynter - Viola & Kiki's stepsister)
- An awkward encounter where the Boss and Lin have to "fight" each other in order to not blow Lin's cover
- The Boss and Pierce having a singalong while blowing stuff up in a drive by
- Lin blowing her cover and almost getting herself and the Boss killed, but Pierce saves them both due to knowing about their history with getting caught
- A final confrontation with Yung, where the Boss gives her a choice, but Yung chooses to fight, not wanting to bring shame to herself or her gang
Noteworthy parts of Troy's Arc will be:
- Discovering Shaundi is still alive, hospitalised on heavy medication, only to be kidnapped by the Hackers and brought to Stilwater
- The Boss and Troy having a bonding experience while performing drive-bys
- The Boss and Pierce finding out that Shaundi is alive and kidnapped, then having to save her
- Shaundi embracing her Stilwater roots, and getting a new outfit taking inspiration from both her hippy and celebrity look
- A final confrontation with the Hackers Leader, who is an AI that the Hackers created to make the Saints think they even needed a leader, so after defeating the Hackers, the Boss just unplugs the computer during the AI's monologue about taking over the world
Noteworthy parts of Dex's Arc will be:
- Dex and Pierce arguing about strategy, while the Boss just ignores them both and decides to "wing it"
- Johnny Gat just returning out of nowhere and completely obliterating whatever operation the Boss, Dex, and Pierce were about to infiltrate
- Johnny Gat stealing Dex's thunder and getting back to business
- Johnny Gat getting mortally wounded by the Brawlers Leader, then getting sent to the hospital (Not sure who the Brawlers Leader will be at this moment in time)
- Dex and Pierce finally having some common ground in both disagreeing with Gat's strategy
- A final confrontation with the Brawlers Leader, where he overpowers Dex, Pierce, and the Boss... But lucky for them, Gat arrives to save the day (but still letting the Boss deal with the Leader) (Gat is also wearing an outfit that takes inspiration from both his classic and celebrity designs)
After all 3 gangs are dealt with, Stilwater seems to be getting back to normal... But when the Boss and Dex meet on the end of the Pier in Centennial Beach, Dex shows his true colours and informs the Boss that all the Saints are currently being kidnapped by the Masako to be killed, before stabbing the Boss and dropping her off the edge of the pier. This will be the only part of the game (or even entire series) to take place underwater, where the Boss manages to hold her breath as she makes her way across the sea floor back to shore. She calls Troy to come and pick her up (who is disgusted by Dex's betrayal), then they rescue the Saints before confronting Dex in the very warehouse where they reformed the Saints. This is where you get the choice to spare Dex and force him to work with the people he's tried to kill many times, or kill him and get some closure once and for all.
Homies by the end of the game will be:
Dex - after Prologue, but will be replaced by Zombie Dex if you kill him
Troy - after Prologue, with both Saints & Chief of Police options
Lin - after MourningStar Arc, with Saints, MourningStar, & Bloody Cannoness options
Shaundi - after Hackers Arc, with Classic, Hospital, Celebrity, Reborn, & Naked options
Gat - after Brawlers Arc, with Celebrity, Hospital, & Reborn options
Pierce - after all 3 Gang Arcs, with Mayor, Celebrity, & Reborn options
Luz - after all Trafficking Levels, with Los Carnales, Shoe Store, & Saints options
Wu - after all Escort Levels
Tobias & Laura - after all Heli Assault Levels
Jane - after all Mayhem Levels
Helmers - after all Snatch Levels
Wong - after all Assassinations
Donnie - after all Vehicle Thefts
Legal Lee - after all Insurance Fraud Levels
Kinzie - after Campaign
Zimos - after Campaign
Angel - after Campaign
Oleg - after Campaign
Josh - after Campaign, with Birk & Nyte Blayde options
Though not stated in the story, the Church will serve as the main HQ and not be customizable, but the old Phillips Building site will serve as a canvas for a fully customizable Crib with options everywhere from replicas of the Saints Towers from Steelport, to a rebuild of Purgatory but on the surface, or even just a simple trailer park... all with customizable interior options too. But this is not the only Crib in Stilwater, there's also the Red Light Loft, and several other purchasable Cribs scattered around the city, all with customizable interiors.
Gang Details:
MourningStar:
A very gothic version of the Morningstar. After the loss of Loren and DeWynter Sisters, they held a memorial funeral at Mourning Wood Cemetery... And soon after, the Cemetery became their new Hideout, and Mourning became their theme.
They control the most of the North Island, and Projects
Hackers:
In Stilwater, the Deckers felt kinda out of place, and like nobody took them seriously. But adding horror movie like theme to their neon wardrobe suddenly made them the most terrifying gang to cross paths with during the night. Their Hideout is in the Factories District
They're spread across the map in districts like the University, Museum, Boardwalk, Red Light, Truckyard, Factories, and Airport
Brawlers:
These guys are basically like the Brotherhood 2.0, former wrestlers, and bodybuilders who now assert their raw power to whoever steps in their way. Mostly controlling the south of South Island, as well as the Arena District, with the Arena being their Hideout.
And obviously all 3 gangs have done some recruiting of their own, so there some variety to them. All three gangs have male and female members, and a range of ethnicities.
Homie Conversations:
Dex & Troy:
Troy: Did I ever tell you about my trip to Santo Ileso?
Dex: Not that I remember.
Troy: The scenery is great... But just like Stilwater, it's plagued with gangs.
Dex: Typical.
Troy: I remember this one gang... What was their name again?
Dex: Troy...
Troy: The El something...?
Dex: Don't do this.
Troy: Oh, that's right. The Los Panteros.
Dex: I hate you.
Dex & Lin:
Dex: Nice job with the MourningStar.
Lin: Thanks.
Dex: What's up with you?
Lin: I still haven't forgiven you.
Dex: Oh, right.
Lin: Just because everybody thinks I'm dead, that doesn't give you the right to destroy my apartment.
Dex: To be fair, we destroyed the entire district, so...
Lin: You preserved the Church!
Dex: It's a Stilwater landmark.
Lin: You could have at least moved my stuff to storage first.
Dex: Well... That's not a bad point actually. My bad.
Dex & Shaundi:
Shaundi: Hey man, I just wanna thank you.
Dex: You do?
Shaundi: Yeah, if it weren't for you, the Carnales would still be in charge, and Loa Dust would have never came to Stilwater.
Dex: Ok, thanks... I guess?
Shaundi: You got any?
Dex: No.
Shaundi: Damn, what a waste of time.
Dex: Fuckin' stoners.
Dex & Gat:
Gat: So...
Dex: Just don't.
Gat: How's that job at Ultor working out for you?
Dex: Fuck off, Johnny.
Dex & Pierce:
Pierce: I feel your pain, man.
Dex: You know what it's like to betray your friends and try to have them killed?
Pierce: No! Shit man, I was referring to the Boss and Johnny shitting all over our plans.
Dex: Oh, right... Well, thanks.
Pierce: I don't feel comfortable talking to you anymore.
Dex & Luz:
Dex: It's been a while.
Luz: You mean since you threatened to kill me just for asking where my boyfriend was?
Dex: Jeez, tough room.
Dex & Wu:
Dex: So uh... How's business?
Wu: Great. I can't thank you enough.
Dex: Oh, glad to hear it.
Wu: All the traumatised people looking for some stress relief after you and your Masako terrorised the city, is making me rich.
Dex: Oh...
Dex & Tobias:
Tobias: It feels great to be back in the game.
Dex: Do I know you?
Tobias: Yeah, I ran Trafficking in Los Carnales territory back in the day.
Dex: Oh, right. I was wondering who was giving them some serious competition.
Tobias: Well, that's all thanks to the Boss. You Saints picked a real winner there. I don't think there's anyone stupid enough to try and kill them.
Dex: I should have seen that one coming.
Dex & Laura:
Laura: Can I interest you in some homemade brownies?
Dex: No thanks. I'm still recovering from Shaundi's cookies.
Laura: Oh, I've had those. They're good.
Dex: Not when you wake up behind a Freckle Bitch's with no pants.
Laura: You get used to it after the first ten times.
Dex: How many have you had?
Laura: I stopped counting after the first ten times.
Dex: Damn.
Dex & Jane:
Jane: I'm standing here, live with the former head of the Masako, now Saints Lieutenant, Dexter "Dex" Jackson. How do you respond to the claims that you and your Masako Team did more damage to the city than the Saints ever did.
Dex: That can't be true.
Jane: I have the numbers right here. $31,313,131.31.
Dex: See, there's no way we caused more damage than that.
Jane: That was your total.
Dex: Fuck.
Dex & Helmers:
Helmers: Hey, you're the asshole that short changed one of my girls.
Dex: Nope, that definitely wasn't me. I have no idea what you're talking about.
Helmers: I may be a stereotype, but I'm not racist. You're the guy.
Dex: Fine. How much do I owe you.
Helmers: You don't owe me anything. But Samantha is gonna be thrilled when I tell her I found you.
Dex: Why do bad things always happen to me?
Dex & Wong:
Dex: So, hypothetically... If I hired your services, would you send an assassin to kill the Boss?
Wong: The Boss is my assassin!
Dex: You only have one assassin?
Wong: One is all I need. The Boss is the only one I trust to get the job done.
Dex: Great talk. I gotta go.
Dex & Donnie:
Dex: Do we even have anything in common?
Donnie: We've both switched factions several times. So we're both not very loyal.
Dex: I think we're done here.
Donnie: Sorry.
Dex & Legal Lee:
Lee: You know, for the right price, I could sue the Boss for you?
Dex: I thought you worked for the Saints?
Lee: I work for the highest bidder... So what's your offer?
Dex: I'm broke.
Lee: Our business is concluded. See you in court.
Dex: Whatever... Wait, what?
Dex & Kinzie:
Kinzie: It's great to finally meet you.
Dex: That's not how everyone else feels.
Kinzie: I mean from an informational standpoint. I've got data on all the Saints, including Lin... But you're an enigma... It's like you just went off the grid after leaving the Saints.
Dex: Yeah well, after the Saints took ownership of Ultor, I had to disappear quick. But wherever I went, it always felt like I was being followed.
Kinzie: Cypher.
Dex: What?
Kinzie: The assassin the Saints sent after you. Her name is Cypher.
Dex: So it wasn't paranoia.
Kinzie: Let's continue this conversation back at my Inner Sanctum.
Dex: Uh... What?
Dex & Zimos:
Zimos: Ever been to Steelport before?
Dex: Well... It's kinda complicated.
Zimos: How is it complicated? You've either been there, or you have not.
Dex: Yes and no.
Zimos: That's not possible.
Dex: Trust me, it is...
Zimos: Well excuse me, if I don't believe you.
Dex: Ever heard of a "concept", or "rewrite"?
Dex & Angel:
Dex: So losing a mask is a big deal to you?
Angel: It's more than just "losing a mask". It's losing to the person you once trusted. The person you trained from the ground up, but the power went to their head. They wanted more, and they didn't care who they had to beat to get it... It's losing to the monster you created.
Dex: Yeah... I know the feeling.
Dex & Oleg:
Dex: So... Are you the Saints Bodyguard or something?
Oleg: I'm the strategist... Along with Pierce.
Dex: So I got replaced twice?
Oleg: Yes, it's no wonder you were made redundant.
Dex: I'm not redundant.
Oleg: Tell me, who does the Boss listen to more? You, or Pierce?
Dex: Fuck.
Oleg: That's what I thought.
Dex & Josh:
Dex: The Saints have actors now? What are you? Johnny Gat's stunt double?
Josh: No, I was supposed to play the role of a Saint in Gangstas In Space, but the movie was a botch job... And in the final cut I only got a few cameos before my character dies.
Dex: Yeah, I got a call for that. But with my past with the Saints, I declined.
Josh: It's a shame, the fans were really hoping to see you appear in the movie... But instead your name's just used in a throwaway gag.
Troy & Lin:
Lin: So, you still think I'm working for the MourningStar?
Troy: You're safe for now, but I've still got tabs on you.
Lin: You were in the Saints longer than me. You've seen my loyalty first hand.
Troy: Yeah, and you saw my "loyalty".
Lin: Tell me... Are you currently arresting the remaining gang in Stilwater... Or are you hanging out with their leader?
Troy: Uh...
Lin: Face it. Once a Saint, always a Saint.
Troy: What about Dex?
Lin: I'm not with the MourningStar!
Troy & Shaundi:
Shaundi: Be cool, he's on our side.
Troy: Who are you talking to?
Shaundi: Oh, heeey... Troy. How's it going?
Troy: Shaundi...
Shaundi: You still with the cops?
Troy: You know I'm the chief of police.
Shaundi: Right, right...
Troy: I can smell the Loa Dust.
Shaundi: It's not mine, I swear.
Troy: I know you're high, Shaundi. But I'm off duty when I'm with the Saints.
Shaundi: Phew... So... You want some?
Troy: Fuck it, why not.
Troy & Gat:
Gat: Hey, so about that sentence?
Troy: You were going to be sentenced to death... But since you were presumed to be dead, the charges were dropped.
Gat: So... I'm good?
Troy: No judge in the world would agree to take your case after you and the Boss took out the entire courthouse.
Gat: Nice.
Troy & Pierce:
Pierce: Hey man, I'm trying to get my music carrier off the ground. You wanna buy my demo tape?
Troy: That depends, do you want to serve your jailtime for robbing Poseidon's Palace?
Pierce: You could have just said "no".
Troy: That's what I thought.
Troy & Luz:
Troy: Hey, I'm sorry about... Well, you know.
Luz: Confiscating my shoes as evidence!
Troy: I was just doing my job.
Luz: Oh, and we're you also "just doing your job" when I saw you wearing them, when I went to your office?
Troy: What!? Don't be ridiculous.
Luz: I could see under your desk, Troy.
Troy: You tell anyone about this, and you'll end up behind bars for the whole summer.
Luz: Not beach season... Oh, my bad. You are not the cop I'm looking for.
Troy: That's right.
Troy & Wu:
Troy: Is my 3 o'clock booked?
Wu: Yes Troy. I'm sure Loretta is looking forward to seeing you again.
Troy: Can I book a 5 o'clock too?
Wu: You know, you could just hire her to work at your office?
Troy: Nah, it's too public. I need to keep this on the downlow until we make it official.
Wu: You're going to propose?
Troy: You're surprised?
Wu: I was just being nice. I had to buy noise cancelling headphones for your visits.
Troy: Yeah, sorry about that.
Wu: Good luck though.
Troy: Thanks Wu... Wait, I though the rooms were sound proof?
Wu: And now you know how loud you are.
Troy & Tobias:
Tobias: I ain't working with no cops man.
Troy: I'm not just a cop. I'm the chief of police.
Tobias: Damn, and I thought the last guy was corrupt.
Troy: I'm not corrupt, I'm just helping out an old friend... Who happens to be the leader of a criminal empire... Holy shit I'm corrupt.
Troy & Laura:
Troy: You gotta get better at your job. Do you know how many times I've arrested you?
Laura: You've gotta hire better security at the prison. Do you know how many times I've escaped?
Troy: I walked right into that one.
Troy & Jane:
Jane: Standing next to me, is cheif of police, Troy Bradshaw. Tell me, Troy, are you aware that the city sees your police force as nothing more than a joke?
Troy: Who else is gonna keep the peace in this city?
Jane: Well... Since the Saints returned, gang violence has decreased dramatically.
Troy: Oh yeah, well who do you think cleans up after the Saints?
Jane: So your police force is more of a clean up crew?
Troy: This interview is over.
Troy & Helmers:
Helmers: Why did you Impound my trailer?
Troy: I told you multiple times to move it for Ultor's retail park.
Helmers: And I told you that I never approved the building permit.
Troy: You were out voted. Was the monetary compensation not enough?
Helmers: You mean a discount coupon for a twelve pack of Ultor brand beer? Of course it was enough... But you could have just moved my trailer instead of impounding it.
Troy & Wong:
Troy: You know, if someone is causing you problems, you could just report them to the police?
Wong: And what if the police are causing me problems? Who do I report them to?
Troy: Or you could just do what you do best, I'll keep my judgements to myself.
Wong: You learn very quick.
Troy & Donnie:
Troy: Is my car repaired yet?
Donnie: You do know how a car works, don't you?
Troy: No, I just want it fixed.
Donnie: Oh, well... I came across a problem with the... Flux capacitor, so I'll need to order a new one.
Troy: Damn, is that expensive?
Donnie: Well, normally it's around $10,000. But for you, I'll give you 30% off.
Troy: You know, maybe Doc Brown can give me a better quote?
Donnie: On second thought, your car will be ready by Friday, and this one's on the house.
Troy: Pleasure doing business with you.
Troy & Legal Lee:
Troy: Fuckin' lawyers.
Lee: Fuckin' cops.
Troy & Kinzie:
Troy: We could really use your skills at the Stilwater PD.
Kinzie: Your "gaming room" doesn't even have a PC.
Troy: How do you know that? You've never even been to this city before.
Kinzie: I've seen every dark corner of this city all from the comfort of my Inner Sanctum. No secret is safe from me.
Troy: Uh... But all secrets are safe With you... Right?
Kinzie: Until I need them for blackmail, sure.
Troy: Well, I'll just be sure to stay on your good side then.
Kinzie: I can recommend a really good designer shoe store not far from your station. They even have your size.
Troy: Alright, but not here. We'll meet somewhere less exposed.
Troy & Zimos:
Zimos: You on duty right now?
Troy: Not when I'm with the Boss.
Zimos: Good... So how's business?
Troy: We just arrested 4 pimps today. What did you say your job was again?
Zimos: Uh... I'm a romance manager.
Troy: Sounds very professional. (talks into radio) Keep an eye on this guy.
Zimos: Who are you talking to?
Troy: Don't worry about it.
Troy & Angel:
Troy: I'd try to make small talk with you, but I don't think we have much in common... Plus I don't care for a sport that's fixed.
Angel: Murderbrawl is not like traditional wrestling. Matches can turn into literal bloodbaths, contenders have died... There's no predecided winner, you win by not giving up. It's a sacred sport that...
Troy: Are you always on?
Angel: I don't like you.
Troy & Oleg:
Oleg: How did you become the chief of police?
Troy: I earned the spot.
Oleg: But did you really?
Troy: I defeated the Saints, the most prominent gang in Stilwater.
Oleg: You did not defeat them, they defeated themselves... You just happened to be in the right place at the right time.
Troy: Ok, but...
Oleg: And I should point out that you resurrected the Saints.
Troy: What!?
Oleg: By keeping the Boss alive on life support, you kept the spirit of the Saints alive too. And once they awoken, it was only a matter of time before the Saints would rise again.
Troy: Wait... No...
Oleg: You're not the chief of police, you're a Saint... Accept it.
Troy: Well, someone still has to run the police department. And I'm the only one qualified, so...
Oleg: I guess you can have your cake and eat it.
Troy & Josh:
Josh: Did you get the part?
Troy: Nah, they said I was too short.
Josh: Did you try that trick I showed you?
Troy: Yeah, but the only heels I could get my hands on were Luz's stilettos. And I can't practice walking in them in front of the other cops.
Josh: Then come over to my place, I'll teach you.
Troy: You sure your place isn't bugged?
Josh: I'll have to check with Kinzie.
Lin & Shaundi:
Shaundi: So, did I replace you?
Lin: That depends, did you infiltrate an enemy gang to gather information on them and bring them down from the inside?
Shaundi: Um... I mean, I slept with people in the enemy gangs, and happened to get information just by being in the right place at the right time... Does that count?
Lin: I would not sink to that level.
Shaundi: "Sink"? I had sex for fun. Getting the dirt on our enemies was just a bonus. Plus that's not what Donnie told me.
Lin: Hey, hands off, he's mine.
Lin & Gat:
Gat: Why didn't you call?
Lin: I was in hiding. Plus I figured the loss would motivate you to wipe out the Rollerz faster.
Gat: You could have let me know, I would've kept your secret.
Lin: You were that distraught over losing me?
Gat: Yeah, so much that I lost focus and got kidnapped by Big Tony.
Lin: (bursts out laughing) You fuckin' liar! The Boss told me all about how you got too cocky and almost lost your leg.
Gat: Oh yeah, well the Boss told me that you were enjoying being tied up by Sharp.
Lin: Fuck you, asshole.
Gat: I missed this.
Lin: Me too.
Lin & Pierce:
Lin: So you replaced Dex?
Pierce: Why is that so surprising?
Lin: Dex was always so serious, and commanding... You're the complete opposite.
Pierce: Hey, I can be serious and commanding.
Lin: No you can't.
Pierce: Yes I can!
Lin: Can not.
Pierce: Can too!
Lin: I don't think so.
Pierce: Man, I hate you right now.
Lin: I think I've made my point.
Lin & Luz:
Lin: I gotta know, why Angelo?
Luz: Mostly for the money.
Lin: That's it?
Luz: Well... He was also "well endowed".
Lin: I think we're done here.
Lin & Wu:
Wu: What are you doing here?
Lin: What?
Wu: You've got a client in 5 minutes.
Lin: Wait, I'm not...
Wu: Don't make me give you a another pay cut.
Lin: Wu, it's me... Lin?
Wu: Oh, I'm sorry. You look just like one of my employees... And the local laundromat owner... And a member of the Rollerz... Have you considered a carrier as an undercover spy?
Lin: No, I've never thought about it.
Wu: Well, you should, you'd blend in really well.
Lin: No shit.
Lin & Tobias:
Tobias: Hey, weren't you a zombie at some point?
Lin: No, you must have been hallucinating.
Tobias: But Laura told me she'd sometimes be hanging out with the Boss and zombie you.
Lin: Well then she must have been hallucinating.
Tobias: Then what about Chicken Ned? He saw you too.
Lin: Fine, you caught me. I'm a zombie.
Tobias: I fuckin' knew it!
Lin & Laura:
Laura: You look different. Less blue than what I remember.
Lin: Um... I was wearing a Halloween costume last time.
Laura: Oh, well it was very convincing. You looked a lot like a real zombie.
Lin: That's the power of makeup.
Laura: And the way you detached your arm to use as a weapon...
Lin: Hey, look over there... Is that a bird?
Laura: No, it looks more like a plane.
Lin & Jane:
Jane: I'm standing here with former zombie...
Lin: I'm not nor have I ever been a "zombie".
Jane: That's not what this exclusive footage shows.
Lin: It's fake... It's edited... It's from a movie... This interview is over.
Lin & Helmers:
Helmers: You one of my girls?
Lin: No.
Helmers: Are you sure?
Lin: (Sigh) Not this again. I get it, I have a very generic face... It's why I'm so good at being undercover. Now can we just drop this.
Helmers: So you didn't work for me to pay for Stilwater U?
Lin: Wait, Helmers? What the fuck happened to you?
Helmers: Ultor expanded into the alcohol industry.
Lin & Wong:
Wong: You still owe me for that tea.
Lin: No, the Boss picked up my tab, remember.
Wong: No they did not, and they promised they'd bring you to me. So where's my money?
Lin: Well played, Boss.
Lin & Donnie:
Donnie: Lin, I uh... I missed you. And I know you were only getting close to me to get information for the Saints, but I feel like we really bonded... And I know you're probably not interested, but... I uh... I know this really good sushi restaurant on the boardwalk... And I was hoping... Uh...
Lin: Get to the point before I knock you out.
Donnie: Do you wanna go on a date with me?
Lin: It's about fuckin' time. Yes.
Donnie: Oh man, I didn't expect you to say yes. Now I'm nervous.
Lin: Don't worry, Donnie. I'll show you a good time.
Lin & Legal Lee:
Lin: So do I have a case?
Lee: I'm afraid not.
Lin: Why not?
Lee: Well, there's too much evidence against you.
Lin: So... I'm stuck with it then?
Lee: Well, unless you can disprove that you were a zombie, then I'm afraid you'll just have to deal with people calling you one.
Lin: (Thinks)... Can we spin it as "discrimination"?
Lee: Now you're talking.
Lin & Kinzie:
Kinzie: You know what I'm going to say.
Lin: And you know I don't want to talk about it.
Kinzie: You did die, no matter what you told everyone else.
Lin: So?
Kinzie: So, how did you come back to life?
Lin: That's classified.
Kinize: Not for long.
Lin & Zimos:
Zimos: Could you help an old man out?
Lin: What do you need?
Zimos: One last night of fun, while I'm still able to walk.
Lin: You know the Boss warned me about you.
Zimos: Well it was worth a shot... I'll just head back to my carwash, where my girls know what I like.
Lin: Wait? You own a carwash?
Zimos: Sure do, best carwash in Steelport.
Lin: Do you do repairs too?
Zimos: Sure, whatever you need.
Lin: How much will it cost?
Zimos: One night, that you will never forget.
Lin: Fuck it, you got a deal.
Lin & Angel:
Lin: Living in hiding sucks, huh?
Angel: You know it. My gym was in such a state, that the Saints hired exterminators because they thought they'd find rats.
Lin: Hey, at least you had your own place. I was living in a storage locker. I had to sign up for fight club just to have access to a shower.
Angel: Oh, so you've been in the arena too?
Lin: Yeah, and let me tell ya, if Sharp had tried to kidnap me now, it would have ended a lot differently.
Angel: Yet somehow Yung was able to kidnap you?
Lin: She drugged me, that's cheating.
Lin & Oleg:
Oleg: Working undercover is no easy job.
Lin: You said it, big guy.
Oleg: Did you ever wonder if you were on the right side?
Lin: When Julius was in charge, there was no question. His only goal was to clear the Row of gang violence... But he knew it wouldn't stop unless we wiped out the gangs altogether... And with that came more income, more power... And more corruption... I wish I could have stopped it, but it was too late... We were all in too deep.
Oleg: I understand.
Lin & Josh:
Josh: Hey, how'd you like to play the Bloody Cannoness?
Lin: What?
Josh: She's a character in my tv show "Nyteblayde".
Lin: Sorry, I'm not an actor.
Josh: Oh please, the Bloody Cannoness is just in the series to keep all eyes on the screen... And to sell merch.
Lin: Yeah, I'd rather keep my dignity.
Josh: Is your dignity in the exposed underwear of that MourningStar outfit? Or somewhere in that extra tight corset that displays most of your chest?
Lin: Hey, that's empowering... Your show is just demeaning.
Josh: There's a scene where the Bloody Cannoness gets to beat the shit out of Nyte Blayde?
Lin: I'll take the job.
Shaundi & Gat:
Shaundi: Hey, Johnny?
Gat: Yeah, Shaundi?
Shaundi: I survived an explosion.
Gat: That's pretty impressive.
Shaundi: And survived being crushed by debris from the statue.
Gat: Where are you going with this, Shaundi?
Shaundi: I think I'm ready.
Gat: You're not ready.
Shaundi: I totally am.
Gat: Trust me, you're not.
Shaundi: You're just afraid that I'll beat you.
Gat: Oh, ok. You can fight me, but don't say I didn't warn you.
Shaundi: Yes! I am so gonna win.
Gat: (Chuckles at her naivety)
Shaundi & Pierce:
Pierce: So, are you angry Shaundi, or chill Shaundi?
Shaundi: What's that supposed to mean?
Pierce: Angry it is, got it.
Shaundi: Hey, be cool. I'm chill... You wanna smoke a bowl?
Pierce: Ok, I guess you're chill then.
Shaundi: You "guess"? Don't I seem chill to you?
Pierce: And now you're angry again... What the hell!?
Shaundi: (Laughs) Oh, this is gonna be so much fun.
Pierce: Fuck it, you're not angry or chill, you're just crazy.
Shaundi & Luz:
Luz: Those are nice boots.
Shaundi: Thanks, they're from the new season's collection.
Luz: Really? I don't have them in my store.
Shaundi: Luz, you gotta stop falling behind.
Shaundi & Wu:
Shaundi: Wu, you got a slot available?
Wu: You know I only have female employees right?
Shaundi: Yeah, but you're a massage parlour, right?
Wu: We used to be. But now we're more of a... "what happens in the parlour, stays in the parlour" type of establishment...
Shaundi: So, you're a brothel?
Wu: I guess you could call it that.
Shaundi: So... Is there a slot available or not?
Wu: Uh... How's 4:30?
Shaundi: Perfect.
Wu: I didn't realise you were...
Shaundi: It's just a "massage", remember?
Wu: Right, of course.
Shaundi & Tobias:
Tobias: I'm surprised you're back on the Loa, Shaundi.
Shaundi: Yeah well, being in charge of Ultor really changed me... But now that I'm back in Stilwater and free from corporate meetings, I can get back to doing what I love.
Tobias: Playing hacky-sack and getting high?
Shaundi: Good times.
Tobias: Good times.
Shaundi & Laura:
Laura: I gotta say, taking the Loa Dust market has really made my business skyrocket.
Shaundi: Yeah, I noticed you and Tobias moved into Price's Mansion.
Laura: Yeah, we didn't need the extra space, but we have so much money, we decided to spoil ourselves.
Shaundi: Good for you. I still need to check out my house... It's been a while since I was there.
Laura: Oh... You may not like what you find.
Shaundi: What do you mean?
Laura: I think the MourningStar raided it... Then turned it into gambling den.
Shaundi: Actually, it always looked like that.
Laura: Oh... You have a unique way of living.
Shaundi & Jane:
Jane: I'm standing here with the cover girl for the Boy Toy magazine, Shaundi.
Shaundi: Is that really what I'm most known for?
Jane: Well, there's your gameshow, where the winner gets to sleep with you. Your online website, where people pay to see you naked. Your record for most ex boyfriends, girlfriends, or just partners in general, in one city.
Shaundi: Wow, this should really be a wake up call...
Jane: But it's not, is it?
Shaundi: Not really.
Shaundi & Helmers:
Shaundi: You still looking for workers?
Helmers: I thought you were set with the Saints?
Shaundi: I don't do it for the money.
Helmers: So... I get to keep the money?
Shaundi: Same deal as before.
Shaundi & Wong:
Shaundi: I am really sorry about last time.
Wong: Apologise all you want, but you're still banned from my restaurant.
Shaundi: So I had a little too much beer and crashed my car through your front window.
Wong: Damages like that happen all the time in Stilwater, but you got out of the car completely naked, then vomited all over table 5.
Shaundi: That part I don't remember.
Wong: They hadn't even finished eating.
Shaundi & Donnie:
Shaundi: Really sorry about your garage.
Donnie: What incident are you referring to?
Shaundi: There's more than one?
Donnie: Well, there's the time you sent the Boss to my garage to find out what happened to Carlos. There's the time you drove a car bomb into my garage, after which I had to rebuild the entire building. And there's the time you crashed your car through the shutter door, got out your car drunk and completely naked, then vomited all over workbench.
Shaundi: I have got to stop drinking in the hot tub.
Shaundi & Legal Lee:
Shaundi: You can't be serious?
Lee: Unless you can prove that it won't happen again, I am.
Shaundi: I'll just leave my keys with someone else before I start drinking in the hot tub.
Lee: It's not just the hot tub, you can't drink at all.
Shaundi: How about this... I give my keys to the Boss before I start drinking, then I can get behind the wheel.
Lee: But you could still find your way to Freckle Bitch's and end up vomiting in the fryers again.
Shaundi: Ugh... Fine, no more alcohol.
Lee: Or drugs.
Shaundi: That's it, Boss we're heading to the courthouse.
Shaundi & Kinzie:
Kinzie: So, you're worried about me bugging your bedroom?
Shaundi: Yeah, that's an invasion of privacy.
Kinzie: You've been drunk and naked out in public in both Stilwater and Steelport... And you're the cover girl for Toy Boy... What privacy would I be invading!?
Shaundi: Oh I think you already know.
Kinzie: My set up's better.
Shaundi: That's a matter of opinion... And personal taste.
Shaundi & Zimos:
Zimos: Hey girl, you look like you like to have fun.
Shaundi: Zimos, it's me. Shaundi.
Zimos: Oh shit. Would you stop changing your appearance so much.
Shaundi & Angel:
Angel: You're the most resilient person I know.
Shaundi: How so?
Angel: You survived an explosion, and being crushed by a giant statue... All the training in the world couldn't prepare me for something like that.
Shaundi: So do you think I could take Gat?
Angel: No.
Shaundi: But you just...
Angel: Everyone has their limits, even you.
Shaundi & Oleg:
Shaundi: Everyone thinks I can't fight Gat, but I know I can.
Oleg: Of course you could fight him.
Shaundi: Thank you.
Oleg: But Gat would win.
Shaundi: You too? Why can't I beat Gat?
Oleg: You just can't.
Shaundi: But I suppose you can, right?
Oleg: In chess, easily... In a fight... No.
Shaundi: Why is everyone kissing Johnny's ass?
Oleg: This is not about ass kissing, it's about determination. Even in defeat, he still manages to give one last "fuck you" before falling to the enemy.
Shaundi: And you don't think I can do that?
Oleg: Tell me, when you were tied up on that statue, did you even attempt to fight Kia?
Shaundi: How could I? I was tied up.
Oleg: And yet so was Gat aboard that plane. But that didn't stop him.
Shaundi: Fuck.
Shaundi & Josh:
Josh: Hey, I'm loving the new look.
Shaundi: And now I want to burn my clothes.
Josh: I thought you were getting back to your roots? Showing the more fun loving, care free side of yourself? I'm sure that side of you would give me a chance?
Shaundi: You know what, you're absolutely right.
Josh: I... I am?
Shaundi: Yeah, so why don't we head back to my place? We'll drink some beer, smoke some Loa Dust, tattoo each other, then I'll take you to my bedroom and strap you to my bed. I hope you're limber, because it's going to be a very rough night.
Josh: Oh second thought, I think I'll ask Lin...
Shaundi: She's taken.
Josh: Then maybe Luz?
Shaundi: I doubt you're her type.
Josh: Kinzie?
Shaundi: Oh yeah, I'm sure she'll have fun with you.
Josh: What?
Shaundi: I said "I'm sure you two will have fun".
Gat & Pierce:
Pierce: Just admit it, my plan would have worked.
Gat: Man whatever, me and the Boss had things covered.
Pierce: Oh yeah, you had things totally covered when the cops followed you back to Aisha's house, so the Ronin knew where the money was, and then they showed up and... and...
Gat: And what Pierce?
Pierce: You know what man, it doesn't matter. It's all in the past now.
Gat: Yeah, all of it's in the past... Including her.
Pierce: Yeah, I'm sorry man... My plan was probably way too complicated to work anyway... With the doll house, and chess pieces... That shit's for movies.
Gat: Yeah, movies...
Pierce: Hey man, why don't we head on over to Tee 'N' Ay? My treat?
Gat: Good call.
Gat & Luz:
Luz: You're a total badass.
Gat: Uh... Thanks?
Luz: You know, I heard a rumour about you... An "8 inch" rumour, if you know what I mean?
Gat: Sorry, not interested.
Luz: Fine, but you're missing out.
Gat: I'll take your word for it.
Gat & Wu:
Wu: Hey, do you happen to know when the next Aisha album is coming out?
Gat: Don't hold your breath.
Gat & Tobias:
Tobias: It's good to have you back man.
Gat: It's good to see you too.
Tobias: Remember that time you ripped a payphone out the ground to fight off those Samedi assholes.
Gat: Or how about the time you unearthed that stop sign and skewered that guy from the Brotherhood?
Tobias: Good times man.
Gat: Good times.
Gat & Laura:
Laura: Are you coming to Toby's birthday party?
Gat: Birthday party? For Tobias? I didn't think he was into that sort of thing.
Laura: It's at Technically Legal during the Policeman's Ball.
Gat: I wouldn't miss it for the world.
Gat & Jane:
Gat: So... Are you going to interview me?
Jane: Why?
Gat: You do know who I am, right?
Jane: Yes, you're the infamous Johnny Gat.
Gat: And you're telling me that's not news worthy?
Jane: It would be, but you've given me so many stories to cover, that the station is getting bored with you.
Gat: Wait, seriously? People are bored with the one and only Johnny Gat?
Jane: Well, you're too predictable... If you were to say, go into a laundromat and do some laundry, that would take people by surprise. But as it is, people know what to expect from you.
Gat: Huh... Well I'll be damned.
Gat & Helmers:
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